Daily Archives: August 18, 2009

munch

I’ve long wanted to write a satire of restaurant reviewing called “Munching Thick, Crusty Slabs.” Except that treading through the emetically hackneyed clichés of kitchen hacks would really be too much for me very quickly: a world where every slice of bread is a slab, as many things are thick or crusty as you can possibly imagine, and one can munch eggs… or squash? I could just scream. But munch really does seem to get used ever more widely, and not just in restaurant reviewing. Apparently not everyone finds this jarring, as not everyone has a present sense of the onomatopoeic origin of this word.

Oh, it’s a word for eating, alright, with the teeth involved and the jaw visibly moving, and making a perceptible noise or at least a clear sensation of crushing; it carries the sense easily in the saying (and one may, if one will, discern some hints of teeth in the shape of the word, but of course that’s adventitious). Since the class of food most marked for its munchiness is that on which we snack, however, the sense has extended to other snackable things. Munching is apposite for snacks: the satisfaction of the crunching amplifies the effect of the food, bringing suitable satiety with less quantity. But the notion of noshing seems to supersede the sound in some quarters, so that one may be said to munch a canapé even sans crepitation.

The rhyme with lunch is unavoidable; bunch can enter in, and even hunch, but somehow punch seems to have less influence. But what words is this one seen around? Ah. Well, a look in the Corpus of Contemporary American English gives us such as Oslo, painting, museum, Edvard, and Scream. Hm! That’s the painter, Munch, whose name is not even said the same way. But he does come to mind when one sees this word. Especially if one is seeing a restaurant reviewer speak of, say, munching ice cream.

sybaritic

This word has a different feel from its near-synonym voluptuary – that word erupts like cleavage out of a tight V-neck, where as this one seems somehow softer, more insidious, but also perhaps more subtly negative in tone, and more feminine. Does it not lead to visions of, perhaps, some barrister’s parasitic sibling named Sibyl, living in the lap of luxury and soon to be a candidate for bariatric surgery?

She’d be borrowing her reputation from a sort of Sodom of southern Italy, a former Greek colony named Sybaris (the y stands for an upsilon in the original), a prosperous place with a lot of money and a lot of luxury too. Its citizens were known for fine clothing and, supposedly, effeminate manners. But a dispute between Sybaris and a neighbouring town, Crotona, in 510 BC turned more than just ugly; the Crotoniats trashed the city, put inhabitants to the sword, and diverted the course of the local river to inundate and erase the city. Now archeologists can’t find anything there.

Crotona, for its part, is now called Crotone and has about 60,000 people. Its name comes from Greek kroton, which names both a tick and a castor-oil plant, the latter of which has lent its name to croton oil, derivatives of which are called crotonic (e.g., crotonic acid, C4H6O2). Croton oil is not something you’d want to eat; small doses can cause diarrhea. If you rub it on your skin it causes irritation and swelling. So we may well say that it is anti-sybaritic!

But let’s go one better. Crotona seems similar to Croatoan, the word found carved on a tree at the Roanoake colony in Virginia, AD 1590. The colony had been thriving when last seen three years earlier, but when a ship finally got back by to check on them, there was nothing left of it, just Croatoan on a tree. Was Roanoake a New World Sybaris? Actually, Croatoan was a name of an island nearby to the Roanoake colony and a modification of Croatan, a local indian tribe that was on good terms with the colonists. So what happened? Well, we don’t know. But I’ll tell you one thing for certain: a colony in West Virginia in the late 16th century was no place you could be sybaritic.