Category Archives: word tasting notes

lambeosaurus

Let us now amble in the beam of that most lambent of sauri, lambeosaurus: a large lizard, nearly 10 metres from bouche to back end, with a coxcomb’s crest – in fact, a headpiece something like a hatchet, or a cartoonist’s rendition of the hairdo of the later Elvis. It had short forearms, and in consequence may have sometimes crouched forward like a kitten playfully preparing to pounce. A gigantic, squamous, green kitten with a beak and a bony bouffant.

The lambeosaurus seems to provoke ardent loyalty. As has been proclaimed on reddit, “we feel that the Lambeosaurus is clearly the best dinosaur, and that no better dinosaurs have existed or will exist in the future.” With a hollow crest that its sinuses actually ran through and that may have been a sound amplifier too (and perhaps an opener for very large bottles), and with eating practices that would not displease a Buddhist monk, how could it not be?

Witness further this video, “Extinct Dinosaurs: The Lambeosaurus,” with “Smackdown” by Blue Stahli for a soundtrack. What is not to enthuse over? (I must confess I can hardly wait for the series on dinosaurs that are not extinct, as the title implies there must be.)

A lack of embalmed specimens has proven something of a problem in labeling this amiable thunder lizard. Paleontologists, having only the jigsaw puzzles of broken bones to piece specimens together, at first took as different species what are now thought to be just different ages and sexes of the beast. It does have more than one species, but not as many as first believed.

Do you wonder where the name comes from? It is named after Lawrence Lambe, a pioneering paleontologist. As the Wikipedia article tells us (note the thrilling attempts at stylistic variation in the sentences!), “In 1902, he described Canada’s first dinosaur finds, various species of Monoclonius. He described Centrosaurus in 1904. Euoplocephalus was named by him, in 1910. In 1913, he named Styracosaurus. He was responsible for naming Chasmosaurus and Gorgosaurus, in 1914 and Eoceratops in 1915. In 1917, he created the genus Edmontosaurus. In 1919 came Panoplosaurus. He also discovered and named the hadrosaurid Gryposaurus.” This passage is like a paleontological nerdgasm in a house of mirrors.

Did you notice that lambeosaurus is not named above? Lambe did not name a saurus after himself. He did study the materials that were ultimately put together to be called Lambeosaurus lambei, but it was not all assembled before Lambe disassembled in 1919. The beastie was named after him in 1923 by William Parks following its full recreation.

I do not know for sure, but I strongly suspect Lambe was pronounced like lamb. Notwithstanding this, in lambeosaurus the be is pronounced: “lam bee o sor us.” We may hold Lambe blameless in this. He did not finish the assembly. It was only once the parts were put together that this extra syllable came to be.

thimble

We all know what a thimble is. It’s a little metal cuplike thing, best known for being little and cuplike. It is most useful as an image for expressing ridiculously small amounts of fluids such as liquor, coffee, and common sense. It’s a Tom Thumb tumbler.

Thimbles are also sometimes collected by people – they have been made in a variety of outrageously cute and decorative forms, some really quite scenic and fine, and consequently quite expensive at auction.

The word thimble is also useful for making puns; in particular, thimble-minded suggests itself readily, though you probably won’t get to use it too often. It also has a taste of nimble (thimble-fingered?) and humble (thimblebrag?) and of course symbol (sex thimble?).

Many people know that thimbles typically have a pitted surface reminiscent of that of golf balls. Most people, if they have seen a thimble in person, happened on it in their mother’s or grandmother’s sewing kit. Or, of course, in their Monopoly game.

But did you know that thimbles are actually used for something?

For many years of my childhood I had exactly no idea what the point of a thimble was. I just knew it was a thing used somehow for sewing, and it was shaped like a cup but you couldn’t set it with the open end up because the other end was curved. Then, one day in my adolescence, I set to sewing some small fix. I found that it really freaking hurt to have to keep pushing the needle through the thick parts of the cloth with my fingertip. The back end of a needle may not be the point, but it’s still pretty acute. And somehow the light just dawned. I knew a thimble could fit over a finger. I suddenly realized why you would want to have a thimble on your finger. Huh.

Look, I learned a lot about cooking from my mother, but I generally had little interest in sewing and never really asked her to show me how, beyond the simplest things. (From my father I learned about photography, in case you’re wondering.)

Sewing was a stereotypically distaff activity for centuries – distaff itself, which means ‘of or relating to women’, is a metonymic use of the name of an implement used in spinning flax into thread – and so the sewing kit and its bits, notably thimbles, could be assumed associated with the lady of the house. A thimble was a small, dainty, ostensibly useful gift. Hence the collectible thing. Even princesses and queens would give and receive them on occasion. Usually ones quite inappropriate for actual use, of course.

And where did we get this word? Old English þymel, from þuma ‘thumb’ plus the suffix el, which we also see in, for instance, handle. A handle is an implement used by and fitted to the hand; a thimble is an implement used by and fitted to the thumb. Or finger, if you prefer. Or, of course, used for its merely thymbolic value.

folderol, falderal

Aina, reading The Little Shadows by Marina Endicott, found this passage: “At the rim of the stage an elegant young man stood beside the piano, one arm laid along it while he sang. A small squirrelly fellow played for him, very flourishingly as to the notes but no folderol in his face.”

She wrote down folderol for future finding. Or, of course, for asking me.

I’m not sure when and where I first saw folderol, but it might have been MAD magazine. Perhaps in a satirical song about bureaucrats or politicians. The context made its sense clear enough: blather, bunk, mumbo jumbo, foofaraw, perhaps fiddle-faddle or taradiddles. The usual dictionary definition is in the line of ‘foolish nonsense’. It gave me an image of bloated bumf and bombast filling file folders full or unreeling from a roll. It sounds vaguely like Latin in the muffled drawl of some peruked barrister, or perhaps legislative terminology as dismissively flaunted by a Foggy Bottom functionary. The usage by Endicott extends it to ‘nonsense, tomfoolery, filler’ in nonverbal senses as well.

But it is fitting and ironic that both Aina and I saw it first in a context of singing. The word comes from musical filler, in the same vein as fa-la-la-la-la, ta-ra-ra-boom-de-ay, hi-diddle-diddle, and so on. So first it was literally just a thing you sang in place of meaningful words.

Interestingly, though, the next meaning it had was not the predominant current meaning. The Oxford English Dictionary gives it as ‘a gewgaw, trifle; a flimsy thing’, with citations starting from the early 1800s, sometimes spelling it with hyphens: fal-de-ral. So, given its fluttery ornamental nature, you could say that this bit of folderol is a lexical falderal. Or this bit of falderal is a lexical folderol.

Yes, it has two spellings, and the one with a’s seems to be the earlier. Amusingly, while the OED gives both forms in the head but falderal first, and the Collins English Dictionary calls folderol a variant of falderal, Merriam-Webster and the American Heritage Dictionary call falderal a variant of folderol. It’s a bit reminiscent of the bureaucratic redirection loops that often come with folderol. Or falderal. Anyway, if you happen to fall into the halls wherein falderal reigns above all, you may want to take a faldstool (or anyway a folding stool); you’ll be there for a while.

wyndre

It’s the start of winter and the end of the year. We’re in the heart of the holiday season, halfway through the twelve days of Christmas. A party is in the offing. There was one a week ago, and those who celebrate Epiphany (or, better, Twelfth Night) will have one in a week, but right now it’s time for New Year’s. Time to get wound up to wind up the year, whether it was a winner or loser, and to wander forth from the waning hours of this year to the fresh wonders of the next. I’ll wyndre myself: I’ll put on my smart new watch – a winder – and a winsome tie, and a jacket to match, and I’ll wend my way to merry-making with my wife or perhaps just wine and dine her at home.

Isn’t that a pleasant word, wyndre? A shiny little trinket for your lexis to carry into the new year. It appears to be made from a blend of parts, perhaps new and dry – one thing the year will be, and another it most likely won’t be. It’s a verb for getting decked out: wyndre yourself, wyndre your face, wyndre your clothing. Wyndre the halls!

Such a quaint and curious little word, isn’t it? With those accordion folds at the beginning, that y for a vowel, that re ending… this word has surely been passed down to us from an earlier version of English.

Well, passed down or found in an ancient curio store or dusty attic trunk. Or, to be more exact, the Oxford English Dictionary.

The Oxford English Dictionary is like a Christmas tree or curio shelf that has been in place for a very long time collecting ornaments, trinkets, geegaws, knick-knacks, tchotchkes. The approach to its contents has varied a little over the years, too, as have the resources it has had to draw on. Today there are squillions of words of content available from all over the world. But in its original edition it had to rely on the available printed literature from the course of centuries, and the efforts of individuals, including such as the prodigious W.C. Minor, who did all his work from his room at Broadmoor Asylum, where he had plenty of time (and where, as his mental state deteriorated, he ultimately divested himself of his family decorations… if you know what I mean).

A result of this is that the OED has, along with all its other treasures, some particularly rare and curious gems sparkling off mostly hidden in nooks. Words marked with obelisks as obsolete. Word that were found in centuries-old books. Perhaps found only once. For example, someone – I don’t know if it was W.C. Minor – looked in the Romaunt of the Rose, a translation by Chaucer in the 1360s of an older French work, and saw this: “Fetys she was…; No wyntred browis had she Ne popped hir for it neded nought To wyndre hir or to peynte hir ought.” And then he wrote up the entry for wyndre, verb, obsolete, rare, transitive, “To trim, deck, or embellish (oneself, the brows, etc.).” Its source: Old French guingnier, guignier, etc., “to deck, trick out.”

That’s its only citation in the OED. Six hundred fifty years ago. Still there, winking at you from the shadows.

Well, what the heck. Pull it out of the old jewel box and wear it. Just for tonight. And maybe peek at it fondly now and again over the course of the coming year.

lambaste

“Just me,” @IvaCheung mused on Twitter, “or does ‘lambaste’ not sound remotely threatening?” To which she added, “To me it just sounds delicious.”

And how could it not, at least to carnivores? Some lovely lamb-based dish, perhaps basted lamb, lambent in its bestial sapidity, the best braised meat you’ve had in ages? The very sound of the word fills my mouth’s imagination with a taste of rosemary and a hint of Madeira in the shimmering juices. Or perhaps, if we are more shellfish, it is an underpronounced clambake, slurred out by someone who has imbibed a bit much?

Is this word in any way semblant to the beating – physical (the older sense) or verbal – that it refers to? Can you imagine the “lam” as the wind-up, and the “baste” as the blow of the fist? It’s odd, though, to have a “long” vowel as the nucleus for something percussive. “Bust,” sure, and even “best” and “bossed” have a bit of punch, but “baste” is like “boast”: blow-hardy but a bit wide-swinging. And when you add the “lam” it’s more ambling, almost amiable. Sure, “lam” is the end of slam, and has something of a short, hard, firm sound, but not that hard, really; it’s resonant.

So where did we get this appetizing word for an unappetizing experience? It’s actually two words put together. I won’t say it’s a slapdash compound, but it’s a compound like slapdash: two words with very similar meaning glued together, wham-bam (thank you, ma’am).

The first part is lam. Does that make you think of go on the lam, meaning ‘beat it’? Guess what. It’s the same word. Lam first meant ‘beat’ (and is related to lame), but just as beat it means ‘leave’ (as we see in the long form beat a hasty retreat), so does go on the lam; Allan Pinkerton (of the detective agency) gives what is the OED’s first related citation, from 1886: “After he [a pickpocket] has secured the wallet he will … utter the word ‘lam!’ This means to let the man go, and to get out of the way as soon as possible.”

The second part is baste. Does that make you think of basting the lamb? Guess what. Yes, the two may be related. It’s not a sure thing! The baste may be related to beat. But even if it is it may be related to brushing or pouring those delicious savoury meat juices and fat onto the roasting meat… Not because the meat was brutally murdered before its cooking, of course. Just for some reason perhaps involving the laying on of the brush. Look, I don’t know, I can hardly think straight, I’m getting so hungry I’ve just ripped open a bag of all dressed chips. Don’t lay into me about it.

oculus

How does this word taste? Is it something succulent, even Lucullan, or is it more reminiscent of an occult octopus (or even Cthulhu)? Is it something from a deep and dark past? Or is it a messenger from the future, shining a light – or a beam of darkness?

It gives us so much to work with. Three syllables and only six letters, but look: in the heart, ulu, a word for a curved knife, shaped like a blade with a cup on either side; flanking that, c and s, one curve and two, related letters, passing through the ulu like an occult transformation; at the start, o, like an eye. This word seems made from Masonic symbolism like that pyramid on the US dollar bill. You know, the one with an all-seeing eye on it. Latin oculus omni.

That’s what oculus is: ‘eye’. If you have glasses, your prescription has lines for OD and OS. That stands for oculus dexter – ‘right eye’ – and oculus sinister – ‘left eye’. Hmm, dexter and sinister. Like the good and bad side of oculus. (Except lately people hear “Dexter” and think “serial killer.” Thanks, TV.)

What you may think of when you hear oculus will depend on the spheres you travel in. (Get it? Spheres? Eyeballs are… never mind, moving on.) If you geek out on virtual reality, you’ll immediately think of Oculus Rift, a virtual-reality headset for gaming. If you’re in it, everything is awesome. But to outside observers, you look like a complete dork. So it’s all in where you see it from.

The same is probably true for the movie Oculus, which is a horror film made in 2013. Some people seem to have liked it; others found it… ridoculus.

If you’re into wine, particularly fairly good Okanagan wine, Oculus is the name of a line of Bordeaux-style blends from Mission Hill, a very nice looking winery set high above the lake with a full line of reliable wines and a heckuva tour. They named their pricy red blend Oculus after the architectural feature that lets light into their cellars.

Architectural feature. Yes, that’s really where you’ll see oculus. The circular skylight (if there is one) in the middle of a dome is an oculus. Similar round skylights in other parts of roofs are also called oculus (the plural would be oculi, but it’s not common to have more than one).

And then there’s the World Trade Centre. The new transportation hub, designed by Santiago Calatrava, has a feature they call an oculus. It is indeed a skylight. But it’s not exactly a hole in a dome. It’s the whole thing that’s there in place of a dome: a large humped ridge with wings, or spines; some have called it dinosaur bones. It may be seen to resemble a closed – or barely-open – eye with long eyelashes. There are a few other analogies also available. What it does not resemble is a round skylight. Or anything small. (The ulus ending suggests smallness. Compare loculus, ‘little place’, from locus, ‘place’; a loculus is a niche, for instance for bodies in a mortuary or catacombs.)

Well, so be it. It’s a bit of a crisp, arch word, with tastes bright and dark. I find it succulent like coquilles. But what I wonder most is: Is there a locus with an oculus in Ucluelet?

cuss

Welp, it’s time we was discussin’ cussin’. It’s a cussed subject an’ some folks can get mighty cussed about it. Use a cuss with the wrong person an’ you might get a cuff on yer head. Or yer hands! Or at least a stern discussion. Or some kinda repercussion.

Funny thing ’bout cuss. It jus’ has that percussive sound. Like a concussion. It has a hard stop at the start an’ then paffs off into a soft hiss passin’. Sorta like a box hittin’ the floor an’ slidin’. An’ the heart of it is just the most neutral an’ central vowel you kin get. So it sorta fits with the sound o’ the kinda word it describes, with that sound o’ hittin’ or a tire burstin’. I’m sure you kin think o’ some o’ them cuss words, with their percussive sounds, an’ maybe it won’t be too bad if I point out that “cuss” said backwards is “suck.” But if you wanna know more an’ you don’t mind readin’ a whole lotta cusswords, there’s an article on it on Strong Language, which is a whole blog on the topic. If y’don’t like the sweary stuff, yer better decussin’ that site. (That’s a fancy way of sayin’ “X it out.”)

Why do people cuss anyways? Seems like breakin’ a rule breaks a bit o’ tension too, relieves stress, accordin’ to some science (same blog, so watch out). Makes ya feel better, right up to the moment yer ma washes yer mouth out.

So this word cuss, it comes from curse. American dialect. Jus’ drop the r an’ y’get somethin’ much more percussive. No curlin’ or growlin’ like a scurvy cur, just a quick back o’ the hand. Loses the literal sense of callin’ down divine wrath, just becomes words workin’ like a hit to the head.

Heck, some people would say you kin give someone a cussin’ out without usin’ any actual cusswords. An’ a person can be cussed without ever bein’ cussed at, because cussed – that’s two syllables there – means ‘stubborn, pigheaded’. But cusswords, well, now, those are cross words, an’ words you don’t use in crosswords.

How about all those other cuss words, like discuss, concuss, percussion, an’ so on? All from the same Latin root, the cuss comin’ ultimately from quatere ‘strike, shake, dash’. The exception is decuss, which we usually say decussate (when we say it at all), which comes from decussis, which means the number ten, which was written X, which is what you make if you decussate. So you decussate to make a cross, but if someone makes you cross, well, then, you jus’ cuss.

cabin

It’s Christmas. It’s winter. It’s dark now as I write this, and the streets and roads are sparkling with starlight or decorations, with snow or rain. I feel sentimental, and am sent to my mental cabinet to retrieve some memories.

Here: a little cabin, glowing in the cold windy dark. A small space of light encased by night, a warmth to cross a frozen yard towards. Cold and dark, night, and beckoning light from a small wooden refuge, warm enough for the time: this, to me, is a Christmas picture, and one I have walked through more than once.

When I was an infant we lived for some duration in a cabin, though I don’t remember it. But we moved several times in my childhood and youth, and on two occasions we were in mid-move at Christmas and spent it in guest cabins, once at a motel in Canmore, once at the Rafter Six Ranch.

I can recall passing a jolly Christmas Eve in the main lodge at the ranch, with light and warmth and people and songs and food and beverage, and then stepping out into the cold dark, just by myself; my parents had already headed over to the cabin. The contrast was stark: light, warmth, sound; then the door shut, and none of the three remained, just me alone at night outdoors in winter at the edge of the Rockies. It was no Thomas Kinkade painting. The snow was windswept, crusted and gravelly, bare patches of dead grass peeking through. The sound was just my feet and the rustling of my jacket, and perhaps the buffeting of the wind. It was a familiar enough scene; I’d grown up around there. But this time I was heading not to a large warm home fully inhabited with stuff, so many rooms owned and furnished and worn easily like personal clothing. This time I was heading to a small cabin, not quite as warm, with just our suitcases’ capacity of effects, the rest packed up somewhere else to be delivered to a new place hundreds of kilometres to the north. We were moving away from where I had grown up, and this cabin was the last warm light at the edge of the woods.

I was already at university at the time, I should say. I was just home for Christmas. But this time there was no home to come to. Well, so be it. Many people spend Christmas at beach resorts, padding to cabanas in the sun to change into swimwear and refresh their beverages. They will end up back home, and all will return to its wonted ways. For me this time, home had stopped being one place and had not yet started being another. We were at a limen, in a temporary shelter, a glowing light across the cold empty snowy and stony night.

This was not a Wenceslas moment; the distance from lodge to cabin was much less than a league. I crossed the barren easily in a couple minutes’ walk and went in. It was not spacious; it was not as well heated as a home; the shower produced a stream less warm and strong than a horse’s relief. But it was there, a light across the frigid silent empty night, with the woods behind.

To me, that is the pattern of a cabin: a cozy remote space of transience, a refuge of light in the great surrounding dark.

I have spent other Christmas Eves in other cabins: the motel cabin in Canmore, similar but less isolated, and the passenger cabin of an airplane – a metal container of light flying through the windy night. I have been in other cabins not at Christmas – our cabin on a cruise ship, for instance: another transient box of light, from which you can look out at the vast darkness of the sea. And I have taken many a cab in the night. We also have our cultural images: little cabin in the woods, Lincoln’s log cabin, perhaps Uncle Tom’s cabin (no snow there, though); in Quebec, the cabane à sucre, a sugar shack in the maple forest.

Some people have lived permanently in cabins. My family lived in one, as I have said, when I was an infant. But originally a cabin was a temporary structure made of light materials, perhaps even a tent – something more resembling a beach cabana. Of course cabana comes from the same source, late Latin capanna. In English the term shifted over to refer to a more permanent structure made of rough materials. They are typically small, and it is from that that we get the ship and airplane sense (on the other hand, taxi cab is from taximeter cabriolet, not related). But the log cabin type can expand: the international airport terminal for Mont-Tremblant is a log cabin, but a very comfortable two-storey one. You do still have to walk across an open space outdoors to get to it, though – there are no jetways.

And a cabinet? A small cabin, originally. Our storage-space sense draws on Italian gabinetto, which comes also from capanna but more altered. Your cabinet is not a light in the dark but a dark space from which you draw things to bring them to light and use. Your memory is a cabinet, and you keep – among other things – the images of your past cabins in it. What better time to bring them out than Christmas?

jinx

We just watched The Theory of Everything. I noticed that the editor was named Jinx Godfrey.

Hmm. Jinx. Haven’t done that one yet. Until now.

Jinx Godfrey’s given name is actually Jessica (of course I dug up her info online; easily found, she’s a well respected film editor), but Jinx is much more catchy, don’t you think? I associate it with one other person in the movies: Jinx Johnson, a Bond girl played by Halle Berry in Die Another Day.

Jinx is also a name (I find) for a female supervillain from Wonder Woman comics and for a female soldier from GI Joe. The lead singer of the American metal band Coven is named Jinx Dawson – her given name from birth (after a family name, Jinks). There’s a line of clothing called J!NX.

Now tell me why Jinx would seem like a name more for a woman than for a man.

No doubt there are elements of traditional masculinist prejudices: women being bad luck and all that. The usual pain-in-the-neck prejudices.

But what else? Its rhyme with minx, perhaps? How about some desired hijinks? Any recollection of the Sphinx or perhaps of Syrinx, both female? Or of wry little winks? The final x has that promissory kiss of sex and just happens to show up on various words for female versions of persons: aviatrix, editrix, executrix… Such multifarious links.

Originally, of course, a jinx could be anyone or anything. The OED gives Jonah as an epitome of the type: the ship he was on was doomed to sink until he was tossed overboard. Even today, we have many jinxes not at all associated with women. If two people say something at the same time, a tradition is to say “Jinx! You owe me a beer” – whoever does so first supposedly collects the beer (although my ledger of beers owed and owing through this claim surely totals in the dozens and yet none has ever been paid).

Also, if a person makes a forward-looking statement that seems to presuppose a positive outcome of an uncertain endeavour, that may be thought to jinx it. Any time some Olympic commentator says something like “The only question is what colour {his|her} medal will be,” that is a jinx; I can’t even tell you how many times (but at least several in my hearing), after that has been said, some disaster has befallen the athlete in question, putting him or her out of the medals. I wish those bloody sportscasters would owe me a beer after doing that, and the athlete too, and pay up. A complete pain the neck – just torture to hear it. I have a bird every time they do.

A bird? How about a wryneck – the bird that shares its name with a condition also known as torticollis that is indeed a big pain in the neck? This wryneck, a kind of woodpecker, has a sinuous neck that allows it to turn its head nearly 180 degrees back, and they use this twisting along with hissing as a threat display. You could consider them Linda Blairs (of The Exorcist) of the bird world, minus the projectile emesis. They also have a history – no doubt related – of being used in witchcraft.

The Greek name of the wryneck is ἴυγξ iugx (pronounced “iunx”), which was Latinized as iynx, which in modern Latin – which differentiates j from i – is jynx. This jynx is the etymon of jinx; the word for the ill-fated person or thing is taken directly from the word for the bird, and respelled.

Actually I like the y spelling better. It’s true that the i spelling has the two dots, but the y spelling has the two tails (and how many tales!), and y is a less common letter, and anyway, maybe a bit of XY would balance out the sexes for this word.

mattock

When I was a kid, I noted a dirty heavy metal implement with a wooden handle in the basement. I recognized it from cartoons, movies, and so forth: it was a pick. Too heavy for me to wield well, if at all, and I was not so reckless as to try anyway.

Only I was wrong.

Not about wielding it, oh no. It was one of those truly obvious someone-could-get-hurt things. I was wrong about what it was. I learned a few years later its true name.

A mattock.

A mattock?

To this day, that word just doesn’t seem right for the thing. A mattock is like a pick but with an adze on one side of the head rather than points on both sides. It’s heavy and hard and sharp and dirty and seems just like the sort of thing some hapless miner would be found with buried in his head by a vanished enemy. I mean, any mattock I’ve seen looks like its apotheosis involves great gobs of drying, crusted blood all over it. And even in its daily use it is for hacking into earth and rocks and being covered in rust and/or dirt. Sure, the sound of its use might come across something like “ttock” (or more likely “thud” and perhaps “arrgggghhhh” after that). And sure, the trajectory of the word in the mouth goes past the soft /m/ at the lips, through a harder /t/ on the tongue-tip, to a sticking /k/ at the back, like a mattock burying into something (or someone). But the word mattock has completely different tastes and overtones for me.

Mattress.

Buttocks.

Two of the world’s soft, comfortable things.

Other such matt matters as matting and matte do not much harden it.

How about the ttock? Taken by itself it would seem to be the exact sound of that pointy end as it meets the unhelmeted skull of the grizzled gold-digger. But it shows up in other words that may not flavour it strongly for most speakers but don’t really reinforce the hardness: bittock, ‘little bit’; brattock, ‘little brat’ (hmm, I was one of those once); dattock, a West African fruit tree; futtock, a middle timber in a ship; hattock, ‘little hat’; kittock, a disrespectful diminutive for a girl or young woman; puttock, a bird of prey; rittock, a tern or small gull; and scuttock, a guillemot. (I thank the Oxford English Dictionary for those.)

Then there are name associations slightly farther afield. Matlock, a TV detective played by Andy Griffith (a favourite of my mother); Ford Madox Ford, born Ford Hermann Hueffer, a British novelist; Ford Madox Brown, a pre-Raphaelite painter and the grandfather of the novelist; Béla Bartók, a Hungarian composer. Indeed, Ford Madox Brown often painted rural folks and workmen, the sorts of people who might use mattocks (though I was unable to find a painting by him in which one is actually represented), and Béla Bartók loved and was strongly influenced by folk music, the music of such working people as also might use such earthworking implements. So perhaps if we crossed the painter with the composer we would get affordable brown mattocks.

Where did we get mattocks? Oh, heck, they’ve been around since time immemorial. As has this word. Actually, it’s a bit of a problem: there is a limit to the memory of where this word came from. We know that it was present in Old English (in various spellings). But we don’t know where Old English got it. Cognates in neighbouring Celtic languages are known to have been borrowed from English, not vice versa. The best we can do, though there’s an attestation gap between the one and the other, is a conjectural connection to Vulgar Latin matteuca ‘club’.

Perhaps with enough digging the attestation gap will be closed. Someone will need to spend the necessary time on their buttocks looking. Alas, it interferes with the necessary time on mattress sleeping. Right now, I know which one I’ll pick.